Most of my life, I have dreamed of traveling abroad. I yearned to experience new cultures, ways of living, and a life outside of the US. After having children, that desire more than doubled because I wanted to expose them to a different reality than the one they experience daily and have grown accustomed to. However, I faced a significant obstacle: where would I find the money and the time to travel?

Most Americans understand that the cost of living here is not cheap. Typically, I spend most of my time working hard to ensure I don’t fall behind on the mortgage, car payment, electricity, insurance, phone, internet bills, and more. Additionally, there's the task of keeping food in the house, clothes on our backs, and the kids engaged in sports and various activities. Oh, and let’s not forget, due to my perceived success, it's also my responsibility to help family members who cannot provide all these things for themselves.

Prior to arriving in Guatemala, I found myself growing increasingly bitter and resentful. I kept trying to tell myself, “Octavia, you should be grateful. You are successful! You are literally living the American dream, and you did it as a single parent! You own a business, a home, a nice car. Your kids are provided for.” But truth be told, I was exhausted.

None of the achievements I worked hard for brought me any joy. Hell, I couldn’t even enjoy them! All my time was spent working, taking care of kids, and trying not to miss a detail or make a mistake that might cost me everything. I was living the life I was “supposed” to; however, there was always a disconnect. A void.

A lack of time and money prevented me from fulfilling my dream until this year! At the age of 36, my children and I boarded a plane headed to Lake Atitlan in Guatemala.

Why I chose Lake Atitlan in Guatemala

For the past couple of years, I've immersed myself in research on the topic of decolonizing the mind and reconnecting to ancestral and cultural roots as a means of healing mental health ailments, particularly in communities of color. While my travels had previously taken me as far as Puerto Rico, I had not yet ventured abroad. When I finally made the decision to stop letting my dreams and visions for my life and work escape me, the very first country I chose to visit was Guatemala.

Guatemala is home to the descendants of the ancient Mayan civilization of Tikal. Although we did not have the time to visit the ancient ruins during this trip, they can still be explored in the city of Flores. Tikal, at some point, was the one of the largest Mayan civilizations in history. After its collapse and later colonization by Spain, the towns of Lake Atitlan have worked tirelessly to stay connected to their ancestral and cultural roots through art, ways of life, rituals, traditions, and so much more.

I wanted to see how this population’s intentional preservation of their ancestor’s identity, and consequently their own, has impacted their mental health and well-being. Overall, I wanted to know two things: are the people of Lake Atitlan experiencing inner-fulfillment and a sense of purpose and belonging? The answer to those questions not only informed my research and practice with the BIPOC community back home; it changed my life!

What My Time Spent in Guatemala Taught Me About Life and How to Liberate Myself from American Socialization

1. Embrace The Simplicity of Life.

During my first few days in Guatemala, I did both a honey and a cacao (chocolate) tour in San Pedro where I was staying. During both tours, the female instructors showed me how they made their honey and their cacao. During the honey tour, we were able to see the actual bees that they use and the process in which they make the honey. During the cacao tour, they showed us how they take the actual cacao plant and turn it in to all types of different chocolate products.

During both tours, astonished at all these women did to make honey and cacao, I asked “you do all of this by hand?! You don’t use machines or other people to help you?!” The answer that each instructor gave was the same “The process is simple. We make what we need. We don’t need machines.”

It made perfect sense. They made just what they needed. But what if they did decide to bring in machines to speed up the process? Both women would be able to produce more product and in a shorter amount of time.

However, the more product they would make, the more the people would likely want it. At some point there would not be enough bees and cacao plants to produce the amount of honey and chocolate that the people would have grown accustomed to having. What would they do then?

One solution would be to disrupt the very natural and healthy process of producing honey and chocolate by adding chemical agents and/or variants that would likely push the bees to make more honey and double the size of the Cacao plants. The added chemicals and variants would satisfy the desire of the people to eat as much honey and chocolate as they would want.

However, it would make them sick and cause diseases due the unnatural agents that they would consume. The over-consumption of both substances would also cause diseases and genetic changes that would then be passed down to the offspring of those who consumed it.

 Who on earth would make all these changes and sacrifices just to be able to say that they produced on sold more honey and chocolate than they could before? Oh yes, that’s right. America.  

2. Practice Minimalism.

Minimalism is essentially the practice of learning to live with less. I started the practice of minimalism about 5 years ago. I am neurodivergent and keeping track of all my daily responsibilities and household chores is already extremely difficult for me. I hate washing clothes, doing dishes, and loath cleaning in general. Moreover, back when I first started my minimalist journey, my mentality was “the less time I spend cleaning, the more time I can spend working and making more money!”

Before I left for Guatemala, I managed to minimize my wardrobe to one that is all Black and consists of no more than 30 items (including undergarments). I threw away most of my unnecessary pots, pans, and dishes and kept only enough for my family of 5. I stopped purchasing a bunch of toys and I NEVER purchased toys with small pieces. I went completely digital and got rid of a good portion of my paper books, and I downsized to a smaller and more affordable home.  I could go on and on about the changes I made, but you get the gist.

When I travel, I like to use Spirit Airlines because they are so cheap! The catch is, they will overcharge you for luxuries such as luggage, carry-on bags, and snacks. You noticed I used the word “luxuries” because that indeed is what they are.

However, they will allow one free carry-on item per passenger. I was traveling for 10 days with 3 children, and I wasn’t about to spend money on luggage or snacks. When I say I packed the bare minimum for this trip, just know that I understood the assignment.

When I got to Guatemala, the only thing I needed to purchase was groceries. Even though I packed so little, we had everything we needed! We washed our clothes every couple of days and when it was time to pick our outfit, we just grabbed whatever was available to us. I did not care if the outfit was cute or not, or what people would say about it. I simply got dressed. I wore make-up once or twice and then I didn’t feel like wasting time with it anymore.

During my time here, I was eager to seize every opportunity to explore. Minimalism had not only provided me with the opportunity to save my money and energy, but it also enabled me to save my time! Time is an invaluable asset.

3. Know Your History, Embrace the Strengths of Your Ancestors and Stay Connected to Your Cultural Roots.

 The people of Lake Atitlan have a deep sense of knowing who they are and take pride in their culture and history. They have a strong identity and possess no desire to “fit in” or change who they are to be accepted by others. This deeply rooted sense of identity and connection to their roots also promotes a sense of unity and collectivism amongst the members of the community.

 The very small town that I stayed in, San Pedro La Laguna, has a population of around 10,000 people. Despite its growing population of tourist, backpackers, and expats, the town remains among the safest and cleanest in Guatemala. The community is approximately 90% indigenous and its members take pride in keeping it vibrant and an overall reflection of their cultural values and history.

 In countries such as America and Europe, this concept is so far from reality that when Americans and Europeans travel here, they do not want to leave; hence the growing population of expats residing in Lake Atitlan. Hell, l had to convince myself of all the reasons I should go back to the United States. It was hard to return to the everyday struggle to connect to something real back at home.

 While the history of the Mayan civilization of Tikal is not one without its flaws (none of us have lived a perfect life), the people of Lake Atitlan has successfully learned to pull from the strengths of their ancestors and leave behind what did not serve their current community well. This is what I love most about my experience learning and immersing myself in the culture of the present-day Mayans.

 As a Black American, I must admit that I am envious of the people of Lake Atitlan’s ability to know the history of their ancestors and to be rooted in their culture. This jealously is a result of Black American’s extreme difficulty and almost inability to do the same. My ancestors were stolen from West Africa and brought to America as slaves.

Due to the perception that my people were nothing more than inventory, the historical slave records only detail the number of slaves in a household and whether they were male or female. No other identifying information. No names. No record of where in Africa they were taken from. No record of which tribe they were a part of. Nothing.

Most families, including my own, has had to depend on stories told from one generation to another, and use that information to dive deep into the historical records to put the pieces of the puzzle together. Many puzzles are still left unfinished.

The lesson here is this: although America does not teach you, as a BIPOC person, the value of knowing the history of your ancestors, knowing who you are, and having an unshakeable identity, you must make this a priority!

It is possible for us as Black Americans to reconnect to our ancestral and cultural roots! It took me many years; however, I was able to discover the stories of the lives of my ancestors who were enslaved, where they were enslaved, and even who their enslaver was! Through DNA tests, I was able to discover where in Africa my ancestors were from. This within itself has been life changing for me!

 Lastly, get to know the stories of your family members both alive and with us in spirit. Dig deep and familiarize yourself with everything! The good, the bad, and the downright ugly. Pull from the strengths of your people, forgive them for their past poor decisions, and leave behind what no longer serves you.

4. Success is not Measured in Money; it is Measured in Freedom.

Growing up in the United States, I was initially taught to work as hard as I can and make as much money as I can. I later learned, through immersing myself in personal finance education, how I should be using that money to make money and EVENTUALLY gain my financial freedom.  At the same time, I was also socialized to feel worthy of myself through materialism. I had to have the nicest clothes, expensive things, and be able to keep up with the financial status of those around me to feel good about myself.

For years, I tried to maintain both expectations of me. I would purchase better clothing for my children than myself because they reflected my financial status. I would purchase nice cars, cell phones, and other electronics. I made sure my homes where in the best areas where the kids could go to the best schools. I tried to work even harder so that I could have left-over money to make those investments that I learned would eventually lead to my financial freedom.

 I desperately wanted financial freedom so that I could have the freedom to just REST and simply enjoy my life. When I arrived in San Pedro and started exploring, one of the very first things that I noticed was the absence of name brand clothing, expensive vehicles, and top-notch school systems. Yet, the people were happy, laughing, and enjoying spending time with their friends and families.

 This made me think back to a parable I read once called “The Mexican and The Investment Banker.” It goes as follows:

An American investment banker was taking a much-needed vacation in a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. The boat had several large, fresh fish in it. The investment banker was impressed by the quality of the fish and asked the Mexican how long it took to catch them.

The Mexican replied, “Only a little while.”

The banker then asked why he didn’t stay out longer and catch more fish?

The Mexican fisherman replied he had enough to support his family’s immediate needs.

The American then asked: “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”

The Mexican fisherman replied, “I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos: I have a full and busy life, señor.”

The investment banker scoffed: “I am an Ivy League MBA, and I could help you. You could spend more time fishing and with the proceeds buy a bigger boat, and with the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats until eventually, you would have a whole fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to the middleman, you could sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You could control the product, processing and distribution.”

Then he added: “Of course, you would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City where you would run your growing enterprise.”

The Mexican fisherman asked, “But señor, how long will this all take?”

To which the American replied: “15–20 years.”

“But what then?” asked the Mexican.

The American laughed and said, “That’s the best part. When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich. You could make millions.”

“Millions, señor? Then what?”

To which the investment banker replied: “Then you would retire. You could move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos.”[1]

The lesson here is this: don’t allow yourself to become a slave to money! You don’t need to make millions to become financial free and have the freedom to live a life that you enjoy.

5. Comfortability is in the Eye of the Beholder.

 I had done a lot of research prior to traveling to Guatemala, so I was prepared to live life without most of the luxuries that America has afforded me. However, researching and experiencing are two different concepts.

 When I first arrived, I was immediately met with the reality of having little to no hot water, no air conditioning, no car, spotty internet, limited access to most of the foods and groceries I usually eat. The roads are cobblestone, so I was unable to use the stroller I packed. When I went about my day, I had to walk while carrying my 30-pound toddler on my chest.

 I had no access to faucet water and had to purchase bottled water to drink and even brush my teeth. I had very limited access to my phone, and I was unable to use it while I was out and about. I think I walked over 10 miles in the first 5 days of the trip and most of them had been up hill. I had no access to fast money because most places only accept cash in a different currency.

And yet … THIS HAS BEEN SOME OF THE BEST DAYS OF MY LIFE!

If I am being honest, I could have never imagined my life without those luxuries prior to coming to Guatemala. However, after this trip, they no longer hold the same level of importance in my life. Your perception is your reality, and the reality is, we can adjust to any situation we are faced with.

6. Spend Your Time Wisely.

The flight to Guatemala took a total of about 7 hours including layovers. After we arrived at the airport, we took a taxi to Panajachel, Lake Atitlan which would take another almost 4 hours. Once we arrived in Panajachel, we then had to board a boat and travel about 20-25 minutes to the other side of the lake to San Pedro.

Our total travel time took over 10 hours in one day! However, the reward was great! Life changing! To some, this may seem like a waste of time and energy, but to me it was time well spent.

In my own reflective practice, I thought about all the time I have historically wasted on things that yielded no reward. No benefit. I did this mindlessly, often, and without intention. I tend to waste time worrying about situations and circumstances that I have no control over; overworking myself just to overspend in my unconscious attempt to release stress; trying to keep up with the image of success so I could feel valuable and be accepted by others; investing in everyone else around me and not in myself; trying to keep others in my life happy when I am unhappy; doing things that I do not want to do out of the fear of letting others down. I could go on and on. However, the point is this: you can make money back, but you can NEVER earn back your time.

Conclusion

In conclusion, my journey to Guatemala has been nothing short of transformative. It has served as a catalyst for decolonizing my mind from the oppressive socialization of American culture and has provided me with invaluable insights into what truly matters in life.

Throughout my time in Guatemala, I have learned profound lessons that have reshaped my perspective on success, happiness, and fulfillment. Embracing the simplicity of life, practicing minimalism, reconnecting with ancestral roots, redefining success beyond monetary wealth, and realizing the importance of time management have all contributed to my newfound sense of liberation and peace.

Guatemala has shown me that success is not measured in material possessions or financial wealth, but rather in the freedom to live authentically, enjoy life's simple pleasures, and prioritize meaningful connections with loved ones. It has taught me to question societal norms and to embrace discomfort as a catalyst for personal growth and self-discovery.

When I returned to the United States, I carried with me a renewed sense of purpose and a commitment to living intentionally, embracing my cultural identity, and prioritizing what truly matters in life. My experience in Guatemala has been a powerful reminder that true liberation begins from within, and I am eternally grateful for the lessons learned along this transformative journey.

[1] Jamshaid, F. (2020, June 7). What You Can Learn from a Mexican Fisherman. Life Lemons. https://medium.com/life-lemons/what-you-can-learn-from-a-mexican-fisherman-a8334882204c